Inside My Mind
by lilymunster
Summary: My sequel to "The Point of No Return." Read it. It's worth your time, I promise.
1. My Heart Heard Music

**This is my sequel to "Point of No Return." I had the first chapter all typed up, and I hit save...and my Internet connection died. I lost the entire chapter. I was pissed. But I figured that I might as well start this now because for the next week I'll be SO busy. Prom is next Saturday, and I wasa fool and volunteered to be on the commitee and we have SO much left to decide on because there are mostly incompetent bitches on the committee. Also, I'm on the yearbook staff and done with my pages, but some other incompetent idiots aren't finished...and the are due next week! So I'm going to have to work on those pages. Grrr...**

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I woke up earlier than usual, even earlier than my father. But how could I sleep? Today was my seventeenth birthday! I was more excited for my party than anything, though. My party was going to be combined with the Vicomte Elijah de Chagny's party (he hated when I refered to him as the Vicomte, so I did it to irritate him) so it was going to be a splendid gala. 

I got out of bed and danced to my closet. I decided just to wear a simple dress since I would be changing into a beautiful dress for my party. After I dressed, I sat down at my vanity and looked at my reflection. Everybody told me that I looked exactly like my mother. Even I had to admit, the resemblence was remarkable. I had been cursed with her curly hair, but mine was nearly black. My eyes were the same shape as my mother's, but I had my father's eye color. So with the exception of my hair and eyes, I looked exactly like her.

I sighed and sat back in my chair and started looking at the little mementoes that I'd saved over the years and at the pictures on my table.

I went over and picked up the picture of my Grandfather Gustaave, who my oldest brother was named after. Gustave had moved to London a year ago to become an architect, and from what he's told me in the letters that he's sent me, he is quite successful. My brother Dante had recently moved out of the house, as well, only he moved to a small flat in Paris. He was a very serious composer and wrote the most beautiful pieces of music. One of his operas was recently performed at the Opera Populaire and it sold out every night.

I picked up the small picture of my family. Papa did not like pictures of himself for the same reason he didn't like mirrors: his face. Mama insisted that he keep his mask off at home, but he was always worried about frightening me. He was convinced he was the most hideous man in the world, which was completely false. I had seen MUCH worse just walking the streets of Paris. Fat, balding, drunken men with crossed eyes and rotting teeth...the thought made me shutter.

I started looking through my mementoes next since I didn't have many pictures. I found my first pair of ballet shoes. I started doing ballet when I was very young, probably four years old. After thirteen years of dancing, I had become the prima ballerina at the Opera Populaire, which many of the girls blamed on my father owning the opera house. Mama said that they did the same thing whenever she was singing lead.

Next, I found a seven-year-old newspaper clipping announcing the marriage of my mother's best friend Meg to the Comte (who then was still the Vicomte) de Chagny. I could not figure out why they had married. They loathed each other entirely and fought constantly. It wasn't fair to their children, Elijah and Isabelle (who was five years old.) or to themselves.

Just then, I heard a little knock on my door. I looked over to see my brother standing shyly in the doorway. After I was born, Mama and Papa tried for five years to have another child, but they only had one miscarriage. Finally, a doctor told them that it was physically impossible for them to conceive. So it was toeverybody's suprise when she gave birth to a healthy baby boy on my fifteenth birthday. "Happy birthday, Erik!"

He smiled back at me. He was a doll. He had curly chesnut brown hair, which was a mess right now, andinnocent brown eyes. "Happy birthday to you, too, Maddy. Can you help me make breakfast because I'm hungry but Mama and Papa are sleeping and I don't want to wake them up and I can'tcook by myself. I'll start the house on fire." I smiled and took his hand.

"Tell me what you want and I'll try to make it for you."

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**Eh...it's not that great. Tell me if I should continue it or not, and feel free to leave suggestions. I know, the ending of the chapter is stupid, but it's after 1 and I have to get up early for school.**


	2. Inside My Mind

_Another update! Anyway, I forgot to mention in the last chapter that I do not own POTO but I do own Erik...little Erik...but hey, you take what you can get, right? wink wink _

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After a breakfast of bland oatmeal (it's all I can cook), Erik went back into his room to play so I decided to sit in the library and read. I looked through the vast collection of books that my father had acquired over the years and finally decided on **Utopia **_(Author's Note: I'm reading Utopia!). _I was about ten pages into the book when I heard my mother calling my name. I closed the book and set it down, then got up to find her.

"Happy birthday, ma fille. I can not believe that you are already seventeen. How quickly the years go by. It seems like just yesterday you were three years old, and now you are grown-up." I smiled and gave her a hug. "I remember telling you on your fourth birthday that you would be starting ballet lessons. You were so excited. I remember watching you at your first practice and looking at the determination in your face. And now look at you. Prima ballerina."

"Thank you, Mama. Speaking of ballet, do you know what time I have ballet practice today?"

She played with my hair and smiled. "Chéri, it's your birthday. You don't have to go to practice today. I'm sure that Madame Giry will excuse you."

I pouted. "I have to practice, though. We have a show coming up in less than a month. And you know what the other girls will say if I miss."

Mama smiled. "I know, mon chéri, I know. Go find Papa and ask him when he's going. But you had better be back here in enough time to get ready for your party. And remember that Gustave will be home today, and I know that you have been anticipating his arrival."I nodded.

"Yes, Mama, I know." I smiled and started up the stairs. "Is Papa still asleep?"

She laughed. "I woke him up when I got up, but you never know with him. Sometimes he's up before the sun, but other days it's a struggle to get him out of bed." I nodded then continued up the stairs.

Just as I was about to knock on Mama and Papa's bedroom door, it opened.

"Well, good morning, Madeline. And happy birthday, as well. Are you ready to go yet? Today's a big day, you know."

I nodded. "Yes, the new show is in less than a month. I need so much practice."

He looked at me. "Do you notremember? Auditions today? Dante is conducting them since he is going to be taking over as the orchestra conductor in a few weeks."

"Those are today? I completely forgot! What are the auditions for?"

"Dante wanted to start off with something well-known, so he decided on **Hannibal**. I tried to covince him otherwise because we have done **Hannibal** so much, but he was determined." I nodded.

"Is Mama auditioning?"

Papa sighed. "No. She said that she needs a break. Of course, I tried to convince her, but she wouldn't and I can't force her. But we are late. Go get your things together while I quickly wish your brother a happy birthday, okay?" I nodded then went in my room and gathered my things. Within ten minutes, we were on our way to Paris.

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_This chapter is SO pointless. But I'm doing another tonight which will hopefully be more...amusing._


	3. Think of Me

_Told ya! Another update tonight! Yay! _

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The auditionswere finally completed. I didn't feel that I had done well in my audition, but Madame Giry assured me that I had done splendidly. The downside to auditons: after hearing "Think of Me" over and over again, I had it stuck in my head. Mama used to sing it to me when I was little, so I knew the words by heart. It was my favorite song. But hearing it repitively, it grew tiresome.

I sat downon the side of stage and started to take off my ballet shoes.Even after years ofwearing them, my feet still got sore in them.

All of a suddent, I heard Dante shout. "Who's singing?" Right then, I realized it was me. I didn't think that anyone could hear me, but everyone was looking at me. I put my head down and started blushing.

I was mortified. "I'm sorry. I didn't realize that I was singing that loudly."

"Come here, Madeline. I need to speak with you." I stood up and walked silently over to Dante. I could hear people whispering but I tried to ignored. I knew they talking about me. I put my head down and stared directly at the floor. I was horribly embarrassed, and now I would be berated in front of everybody.

"Sit down, Maddie." I obeyed what he said.

"I'm honestly very sorry, Dante-" He cut me off before I could finish.

"Follow me. We have to go for a little walk." I swallowed hard but once again obeyed. He led me to Papa's office. "Stay here. I'll be out in a moment."

I paced up and down the hallway and finally sat down on the floor. They had only been in there for a few minutes but it felt like an eternity to me. I did not want either of them to be angry at me, but most of all, I wanted to know what they were talking about.

Finally, the door opened and Dante motioned for me to come in. I walked in and sat down. "Dante, I already apologized. I seriously think that you are overreacting. I wasn't even singing that loudly."

"Madeline, I have to be honest with you. Your voice was the best that I've heard all day. In fact, I think that you would be perfect for Elissa. Of course, you would have to audition like everybody else, but I feel that you are the best choice."

All I could do was look at him strangely. Finally, I managed to sputter out a few words. "What are you talking about? I don't sing. You know that. Papa, tell him that he is talking nonsense."

Papa looked at me, then at Dante. "I think that if Dante thinks you should audition, you should listen to him. He does have quite an ear for music, Madeline. So I think that you should listen to your brother."

"But I-I...Fine. I'll audition and make a complete fool of myself if that's what you would like."

Dante and Papa both grinned. Dante nodded. "Merci, Madeline. I don't think that you should waste your talents." I sighed as I got up and followed them out of the office and back to the stage area. By now, everybody but a few stagehands had left. I inhaled deeply and Dante cued for the music to start. All I could do was close my eyes and sing.

_Think of me,  
Think of me fondly,  
When we've said goodbye.  
Remember me once in a while  
Please promise me you'll try.  
When you find that, once again,  
You long to take your heart  
Back and be free -  
If you ever find a moment,  
Spare a thought for me...  
We never said our love was evergreen,  
Or as unchanging as the sea  
But if you can still remember,  
Stop and think of me...  
Think of all the things  
We've shared and seen -  
Don't think about the things  
Which might have been...  
Think of me,  
Think of me waking, silent and resigned.  
Imagine me, trying too hard  
To put you from my mind.  
Recall those days,  
Look back on all those times,  
Think of the things we'll never do -  
There will never be a day,  
When I won´t think of you..._

When the song finished, I let out a long sigh. "Are you pleased now?" I looked down at Papa, who was beaming, and Dante.

"Happy Birthday, Madeline...you got the part."

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_Yay, she sings. Please R&R, tell me how you like it and where it's going. _


	4. Her Teacher

_My computer is kicking my ass tonight. It wouldn't let me save my PowerPoint presentation to a disk, so I had to fix it, which stressed me out. Anyway, this is probably my last update for the next week (Tues: Kickboxing, Wed: Pick up sister's prom dress/brother's graduation robe, Thurs: Either kickboxing or pick up my prom dress, Fri: Brother's concert, Sat: Prom, Sun: RECOVER!). Wow, my week is planned. Plus, I **FINALLY **got my Two-Disk Phantom of the Opera DVD today, so I have to find time to watch it! Anyway, on with the story. Remember, I don't own POTO. Just reminding you in case you forgot or in case Gaston Leroux decided to read this. _

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"Are you absolutely insane? I honestly that that you have lost it. You've gone absolutely batty! I can't sing! I don't sing! Papa, I think that we need to commit him. Something is wrong with his hearing." 

"Madeline, come sit down. We need to talk. Dante...go gloat about your discovery. I must admit, I'm rather proud of you." Dante got up walked away while I went down and sat by Papa.

I sat down in a chair next to Papa and sighed. "Are you just trying to make him feel good or are you serious?"

He smiled. "I'm serious, Madeline. You sound just like your mother when you are singing."

"I do not."

"Are you calling me a liar? I'm not a liar. Remember, I was your mother's teacher for years. Trust me, I know that you sound like her." I started to blush. If he said it, it must be true. "Madeline, will you do your mother a favor and sing in the opera? If you don't, Dante said that he was going to plead with her to sing in it because he said that he has heard no talent today."

I sighed. "I-I don't know. What do you think I should do?"

"I think that you should but the decision is entirely yours."

I bit my lowerlip and thought for a few mintues. "I think that I'm going to do it, Papa.But for Mama's sake. Not because I want to."

He nodded. "Good, good. Well now, I suppose that we should be getting home now to tell your mother and you have to get ready for your big party tonight. Did I tell you that Dante was coming home with us?"

I nodded and we both stood up. I followed him to the door, where Dante was waiting eagerly. "Is she going to do it?"

I rolled my eyes. "Yes, Dante, you got your way...again! But I'm only doing it because you couldn't find anyone else and I didn't want you trying to convince Mama into doing it."

Dante started to laugh. "You know that you want to. What ballet rat doesn't dream of becoming the Prima Donna?"

"Don't call me a ballet rat or a Prima Donna! I'm neither. You are...a stuffy old composer."

"I know. At least I can admit it." I couldn't think of any retaliation, so all I did was stick my tongue out at him.

The ride home wasn't as eventful. Dante and I stopped acting like children and started talking about my party. I could barely contain my excitement.

When we arrived home, I burst into the house. I wanted to get ready, but I also knew that Gustave was home. I hadn't see Gustave in what seemed like forever. I was excited to see him.

I found him withMama and Erik in the library. "Gustave! I missed you!" I ran up and gave him a hug.

"Happy birthday, little sister! I remember when I was seventeen. So many years ago. Now I'm an old man. Come take a walk with me, we have a lot to catch up on, and we have to find Dante." He picked up Erik and we started to lave.

I was just about to leave when Mama spoke up. "I'm sorry, Maddy, but you can't. You have to start getting ready. Figuring out how to get that dress on is going to take long enough."

I sighed. "Sorry, Gustave. I have to get ready. Dante shouldn't be too far off."

He nodded and exited the room chattering to Erikjust as Papa entered. "Christine, did Madeline tell you her news?" I sat down and covered my face.

"No, Papa, I thought that I'd leave it to you." Mama looked at both of us quizically. Papa took her gently by the arm and led her out to the hallway. I looked up at the celing just waiting for her response.

All of a sudden I heard a squeal and she came running into the room, followed by Papa. "Why didn't you tell me? I'm so happy for you! I got my start singing in **Hannibal**. I'm so proud of you! I was proud of you before, but now it's like you are walking in my footsteps. I'm thrilled!" She was acting like and excited child. I couldn't help laughing and I could see that Papa was laughing as well.

"Christine, I think that you are embarrassing her. She's very easily embarrassed, I think."

"I can't help it! I'm so proud of her! And now I won't have to do every single show. Now I'll be able to spend some time at home and with you." She turned around and wrapped her arms around Papa's neck and started kissing him. I was used to it, but I still thought it was disgusting and it made me uncomfortable. "I'll be upstairs getting ready. Just...come up whenever you are finished." I quickly left the room and went into my room. I opened up my closet and pulled out my dress. It really was a beautiful garment. It was pale pink and had intricate beading all over it. I was almost terrified to touch it.I knew that I would need help getting into it, so I sat down and waited for Mama.

After waiting for an hour, Mama finally came to help me. When she entered the room, I just rolled my eyes. I could tell what was going on by the way she looked. "It's about time, Mama. I could've gotten ready by myself in this time."

She started blushing. "I'm sorry, Madeline...I...um...was very busy...um...settling little Erik down."

I sighed. I pretended to believe her, even though I knew what was really going on. "Okay, let's try to figure this dress out."

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_Not good, not good, I know! At least we got a hint of some E/C action. wink wink Anyway, R&R!_


	5. All the Creme de la Creme

_SUPRISE! ANOTHER UPDATE! Hehe, I just don't feel like doing homework. This week flew by...Prom is Saturday and I still haven't decided on a hair style! (P.S. If you would like to help me decide, here are the two that I am considering and I hope I don't get yelled at for putting these on here lol...I need help though!) Anyway, I don't own POTO...sulks in corner_

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Within three hours we were ready to go. We were bringing Erik but he would be staying with Isabelle and her nanny for the night.

Walking into the Chagny estate was an obstacle. There were so many people, most of whom I had never seen. The first thing my parents did was bring Erik upstairs before he became too overwhelmed. I tried to stay near Dante and Gustave but I somehow managed to get separated.

I stood in one spotlooking around for a familar face, but it was unsuccessful. All of a sudden, I felt someone grab my hand and pull me into a different room.

"Elijah! Don't do that! I didn't know who it was. There are so many people here. Do you actually know them all?"

He scoffed. "My father is using our birthday party as a social gathering for his friends...it's more of a business meeting for him, I guess. But I'm sure that he'll get drunk, like usual, and make an ass of himself, like usual." I bit my lip and looked away. I always felt awkward when Elijah spoke of his father.

"Maybe not, Elijah. Maybe he'll be decent tonight." Elijah smiled.

"You always manage to find the positive in every situation, don't you?" I shrugged my shoulders and flashed him a big smile, then wrapped my arms around his neck.

"You can't always be so pessimistic, Eli. You are probably right about your father, I'm not trying to be rude, but I'm just saying that there's a chance." He laughed.

"Hopefully fate falls our way tonight." He wrapped his arms around my waist and looked in my eyes. "You look beautiful tonight, did I tell you that?"

I looked away and blushed. "Stop embarrassing me. I'm sure that most of the women here look better than I do."

"Nonsense. They are all overdone. You look perfect."

"Stop it! Now I'm blushing so I'll havea red face. My face won't match my dress!" Elijah started laughing.

"It matches perfectly." I ran my hands through his hair then rested them on his neck again.

"Silly, silly boy. You always have to make me blush." I picked a piece of lint of his shirt, then he leaned in and kissed me gently on the lips.

The kiss only lasted for a few moments, then he whispered, "I suppose that we should get back to the party."

I nodded and took his hand as he led me back to the splendid gala.

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_Big shocker, right. Just kidding. Y'all saw it coming, didn't ya? Well, R&R please!_


	6. A Secret Engagement

_Hey! I'm glad that I suprised a few people. Yay. But anyway, my schedule shouldn't be as busy now that prom is over, thank god. It was...meh. Not the greatest thing in the world. And we couldn't find anything to do after we left so we drove around for hours. It was sad. My parents actually came home from wherever they were drunk and I didn't. Quite sad. But anyway...THIS STORY IS A CREATION OF MY MIND. I DON'T OWN PHANTOM OF THE OPERA OR THE ORIGINAL CHARACTERS, BUT I OWN THIS STORY! HEHE IT'S MINE!_

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The party went suprisingly well. Meg forced Raoul to go to bed before he was too drunk, thankfully. There were a few drunk noblemen who tried flirting with me and Mama, which was actually quite comical. I was quite exhausted when we left, and the moment we got home, I went straight to bed. 

The next few weeks were extremely busy. I had ballet practice every day, then I had to work on conditioning my voice for **Hannibal.** After the first opera was completed, I wanted to take a few days off to rest, but I was not allowed. Practice for **Hannibal** started the next day.

Finally, it was the opening night for **Hannibal**, my premire as a singer. I was absolutely terrified. As I sang my biggest solo, _Think of Me_, I could feel my voice shaking, but I tried desprately to keep focused. After it was over, I took my bows and the rest was a blur. I have no recollection of leaving the stageand fighting my way through the people to my dressing room. The next thing I remembered was my family coming into my dressing room and showering me with flowers and praise.

After a few minutes, they left me to change out of my costume and recompose. I was overwhelmed and there were people banging on my door. I just wanted to be left alone, but Mama told me what to expect, so I wasn't suprised.

I sat down and started taking down my hair, when I heard my door open. I turned to look, only to see Elijah standing there. I smiled and ran up to hug him.

"How did I do? I was so nervous, Elijah! I thought that I was going to faint."

"You sang beautifully. A few of the older patrons, my parents included, all agreed that you looked and sounded exactly like your mother. I'm so proud of you."

"You're embarrassing me! I'm too modest to be in this position."

"That's what I love most about you. It is so easy to embarrass you. It's adorable."

"That's a horrible thing for you to say! You shouldn't try to embarrass me!"

"I can't help it! I tell you that you look beautiful, which you always do, and you get embarrassed." I sighed.

"I'm sorry, then. I'll try not to get embarrassed so much." He smiled and kissed me gently on the lips. Just as it started getting passionate, there was a hard knock on the door.

"Madeline, are you almost finished?" It was Dante. The mood was quickly ruined.

"Yes, Dante, I'm almost finished. You try changing out of these things. It's impossible."

"I'd rather not. Just hurry up. Everybody is waiting and getting impatient."

"It will just take a few more minutes, Dante. Give me time!" I heard him walk away and sighed with relief andElijah looked at me strangely.

"You haven't told them about us yet?"

"I'm sorry, Elijah. Try to understand. It's not that easy. They still think of me as their baby. Just give it time. We've only been 'official' for a short while. I will tell them, though, don't worry. But now, make yourself useful and help me! These costumes are so difficult!"

"You won't tell your parents about us, but you want me to help you undress. This is certainly inappropriate."

"Eli, don't start with morals right now. I really need help. This costume is uncomfortable. Please?" He exhaled and did as I said.

Within minutes, I asked Elijah to leave and I finished changing. I quickly left the room and met up with my impatient family.

"I'm sorry it took me so long, but I had difficulties. I'm very sorry, though."

"It's okay, Madeline, I understand. Those costumes are buggers." I looked at Mama with thankful eyes. She was the only one who truely understood. We started out of the opera house, but before we left, Dante grabbed my arm and held me back.

"Is there something going on with you and Elijah."

"No!" I quickly looked away and nervously started playing with my hair. Dante simply nodded.

"That's what I thought. How long has this been going on?"

"What are you talking about? There is nothing."

"Maddy, you can't hide this forever. People aren't stupid. I've seen the way you look at each other and I heard him in your dressing room. So don't undermine my intelligence. It's insulting."

I sighed heavily. He was right. "It hasn't been going on long, maybe a few months at the most. Officially, that is. I just haven't found the right way or time to tell anyone. I've wanted to tell, especially you, but I just can't put it in words. It's so special, so right."

Dante started walking and pushed me a little get me moving. "Hurry up, we have to catch up. Wait...tell Maman that you want to stay and celebrate tonight. I have to talk to you about this. I'm rather blown away, although I shouldn't be. Everybody has seen it coming for years, ever since you two were tots."

I smiled and shook my head, but ran to catch up with my parents. "Maman, can I please stay to celebrate our great triumph tonight? Please?"

Mama looked and Papa and sighed. "Fine, darling, but I wantdon't want you staying out too late or going alone. If you decide not to come home, stay at your brother's. Do you understand." I nodded, then quickly ran back to catch up with Dante.

"She said yes. Now what did you have in mind."

"I need to talk to you about several different things. First of all, congratulations tonight. You did extremely well, and I think that you have found a permanent position as the leading soprano. Second, rehearsals for the next opera will be in two days, so practice. Naturally, you will get the part since you are the best we've had, but for fairness, you must audition. Third, I need details about...this. You and Elijah. Not just from you, though. Where is he? I need to talk to him, as well."

My mouth dropped. "Dante! You are acting too much like a father right now. He's going to get it enough after I tell Papa so he doesn't need it from you. I'll tell you everything when we get to your flat." Dante smiled at me.

"I got you good. I wouldn't interrogate him. I know his intentions are well. Now let's go. I need to hear about this from you."

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_Hehe, that's how my brother was when he heard about my sister and one of her boyfriends. My brother is a sweetheart, though, and he has the sweetest girlfriend. Anyway, R&R, I know this chapter was bad. And the title had nothing to do with the chapter. No secret engagement._


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